Demande de correction pour un texte en anglais

Desporoots · 01-23-2007, 06:34 AM

Bonjour a tous
je dois écrire une fin de roman en anglais au temps du récit. Voila donc ma prose, en espérant que quelqu'un pourra m'aider a en corriger les fautes

After having learned with television that Jack Barker had faked the elections, the queen decided to turn over to Buckingham Palace to recover her power and rule the country. Arrived at the palate, it precipitated inside and fell nose to nose with Jack. "You! You cheated to be elected! You will return give me back my power immediately to me! ", the queen exclaimed. Jack tried to protest but he was immediately cut by the queen "Because of you I had to live in misery during several months. I have to remove of Buckingham Palace and to live in a tiny apartment without my staff. I require you leave from here immediately while waiting for your lawsuit which will take place soon ", the queen says that with an contemptuous expression of revenge . Jack tried to be justified but before to have been able to pronounce one word, he was carried of force by the royal guards. Finally, the queen got back her old functions by taking of account the republican ideas to improve the living conditions of the population and tried to reduce the problems of class-riden. Jack Barker was condamned to the inegibility for life.

The_FD · 01-23-2007, 08:59 AM

Une relecture rapide, je n'ai pas trop prêté attention aux concordances des temps

After She learned via the television that Jack Barker faked the elections, the Queen decided to go back to Buckingham Palace to recover her power and rule the country. Once at the palace, She moved quickly inside and felt nose to nose with Jack. "You! You cheated to be elected! You shall give my power back immediately! ", yelled the Queen. Jack tried to protest but he was immediately cut by the Queen "Because of you I had to live in misery during several months. I had to move away from Buckingham Palace and live in a tiny apartment without my staff. You must leave immediately while waiting for your case which will take place soon ", the Queen said that with an contemptuous expression of revenge. Jack tried to justify but before to he could pronounce one word, he was taken out by the royal guards. Finally, the Queen got back to her old functions by taking into account the republican ideas to improve the living conditions of the population and tried to reduce the problems of class-riden. Jack Barker has been condamned to the inegibility for life.

NAR · 01-23-2007, 06:07 PM

Quote:

After having learned with television that Jack Barker had faked the elections, the queen decided to turn over to Buckingham Palace to recover her power and rule the country. Arrived at the palate, it precipitated inside and fell nose to nose with Jack. "You! You cheated to be elected! You will return give me back my power immediately to me! ", the queen exclaimed. Jack tried to protest but he was immediately cut by the queen "Because of you I had to live in misery during several months. I have to remove of Buckingham Palace and to live in a tiny apartment without my staff. I require you leave from here immediately while waiting for your lawsuit which will take place soon ", the queen says that with an contemptuous expression of revenge . Jack tried to be justified but before to have been able to pronounce one word, he was carried of force by the royal guards. Finally, the queen got back her old functions by taking of account the republican ideas to improve the living conditions of the population and tried to reduce the problems of class-riden. Jack Barker was condamned to the inegibility for life.

Having learnt via television that Jack Barket had faked the elections, off went the queen to the Buckingham Palace, fully determined to recover her power and rule the country. Hardly had she reached the palace that she rushed inside and came across Jack. “You! You cheated to be elected! So now, you shall give me back my power!”, exclaimed the queen. Jack was about to protest when the queen hurriedly added “Because of you, I had to live in misery for several months. I had to move out of Buckingham Palace and live in a tiny apartment without my staff”. The queen made no effort to mask the expression of contempt on her face as she uttered “I demand that you quit this place immediately. Your lawsuit will follow soon”. Before Jack could explain himself, the Buckingham Palace guards were already on the spot and took him away. Finally, the queen was assigned her previous role and considered republican solutions in order to improve the living conditions of the people.

Quote:

Finally, the queen got back her old functions by taking of account the republican ideas to improve the living conditions of the population and tried to reduce the problems of class-riden. Jack Barker was condamned to the inegibility for life.

Je n'ai pas compris ce que vous voulez dire par 'class-riden' et 'condemned to the inegibility for life'.

A bientôt!

Desporoots · 01-24-2007, 12:51 PM

"class-riden" signifie les "problèmes d'inégalités sociales"
"condemned to the inegibility for life" veut dire qu'il est inéligible à vie

merci a vous deux, The FD & NAR, pour votre aide

NAR · 01-24-2007, 01:20 PM

Je vous en prie.

Quote:

"class-riden" signifie les "problèmes d'inégalités sociales"

Dans ce cas-ci, je modifie la phrase:

Finally, the queen was assigned her previous role and considered republican ideas in order to improve the living conditions of the people and solve social problems.

01-23-2007, 06:34 AM	#1 (permalink)
Desporoots Growing Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 18 Desporoots is an unknown character at this point	Demande de correction pour un texte en anglais Bonjour a tous je dois écrire une fin de roman en anglais au temps du récit. Voila donc ma prose, en espérant que quelqu'un pourra m'aider a en corriger les fautes After having learned with television that Jack Barker had faked the elections, the queen decided to turn over to Buckingham Palace to recover her power and rule the country. Arrived at the palate, it precipitated inside and fell nose to nose with Jack. "You! You cheated to be elected! You will return give me back my power immediately to me! ", the queen exclaimed. Jack tried to protest but he was immediately cut by the queen "Because of you I had to live in misery during several months. I have to remove of Buckingham Palace and to live in a tiny apartment without my staff. I require you leave from here immediately while waiting for your lawsuit which will take place soon ", the queen says that with an contemptuous expression of revenge . Jack tried to be justified but before to have been able to pronounce one word, he was carried of force by the royal guards. Finally, the queen got back her old functions by taking of account the republican ideas to improve the living conditions of the population and tried to reduce the problems of class-riden. Jack Barker was condamned to the inegibility for life.
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01-23-2007, 08:59 AM	#2 (permalink)
The_FD flying dancer Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Paris France Posts: 4,281 The_FD is a splendid one to behold The_FD is a splendid one to behold The_FD is a splendid one to behold	Une relecture rapide, je n'ai pas trop prêté attention aux concordances des temps After She learned via the television that Jack Barker faked the elections, the Queen decided to go back to Buckingham Palace to recover her power and rule the country. Once at the palace, She moved quickly inside and felt nose to nose with Jack. "You! You cheated to be elected! You shall give my power back immediately! ", yelled the Queen. Jack tried to protest but he was immediately cut by the Queen "Because of you I had to live in misery during several months. I had to move away from Buckingham Palace and live in a tiny apartment without my staff. You must leave immediately while waiting for your case which will take place soon ", the Queen said that with an contemptuous expression of revenge. Jack tried to justify but before to he could pronounce one word, he was taken out by the royal guards. Finally, the Queen got back to her old functions by taking into account the republican ideas to improve the living conditions of the population and tried to reduce the problems of class-riden. Jack Barker has been condamned to the inegibility for life. __________________ L'histoire de la famille Bourdillon Les fêtes d'Hébé The flying dancer dancing
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01-24-2007, 12:51 PM	#4 (permalink)
Desporoots Growing Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 18 Desporoots is an unknown character at this point	"class-riden" signifie les "problèmes d'inégalités sociales" "condemned to the inegibility for life" veut dire qu'il est inéligible à vie merci a vous deux, The FD & NAR, pour votre aide
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