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Old 04-25-2006, 02:23 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Bonjour
Pouvez vous améliorer ma traduction de ceci svp?

A propos de Pervenche, sa mère disait avec une sorte de gaieté inconsciente : « Oh, tu
sais, elle mène sa vie. (…) Qu’est-ce tu veux que je fasse ? Je ne vais pas la forcer. » Elle a
répété la phrase absurde : « Elle a sa vie et moi la mienne. »
Clémence a obtenu l’adresse de Pervenche. Apparemment, elle n’avait plus le
téléphone. On bien elle ne voulait plus qu’on l’appelle.
Un long week-end de septembre, Clémence a pris le train pour Marseille. Quand elle a
sonné à la porte, c’est un loubard qui est venu lui ouvrir. Un grand Antillais en short, avec un
tatouage en relief sur l’épaule, ou peut-être une cicatrice. Quand elle a dit qu’elle était la sœur
de Pervenche, il l’a laissée passer. Pervenche était dans la pièce du fond, elle venait de se
réveiller. Elle avait les traits bouffis, un T-shirt froissé, les cheveux sales. Clémence a eu du
mal à la reconnaître, depuis près de deux ans qu’elle ne l’avait pas vue.
Elles ont parlé de choses et d’autres, mais elles n’avaient plus rien à se dire. Elles
n’étaient plus sur la même longueur d’onde.




About Pervenche, her mother said with a kind of unconscious cheerfulness: "Oh, you know, she carries out his life (...) Which is you want that I make? I will not force her "She repeated the sentence absurdity: "she has her life and me the mine."
Clemence obtained the address of Pervenche. Apparently, she did not have any more the telephone. Or she did not want any more that she is called.
A long weekend of September, Clémence travelled by the train for Marseille. When she sounded with the door, it is a hooligan who came to open to him. A large West-Indian out of shorts, with a tattooing in relief on the shoulder, or perhaps a scar. When she said that she was the sister of Pervenche, he let her pass. Pervenche was in the part of the bottom, she had just awaked. She referred bouffis, a ruffled Tee-shirt, the dirty hair. Clemence had evil to recognize her, since nearly two years that she had not seen it.
They spoke about things and others, but they did not have anything any more to be said. They were not any more over the same wavelength.

Last edited by djibril15; 04-25-2006 at 02:25 PM.
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Old 04-25-2006, 02:36 PM   #2 (permalink)
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juste une petite question...as-tu fait ça avec un traducteur automatique?
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Old 04-25-2006, 04:03 PM   #3 (permalink)
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en partie oui
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Old 04-25-2006, 04:17 PM   #4 (permalink)
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oui, et figure-toi que ça se repère très facilement, donc ce n'est pas le peine d'essayer de nous tromper en parlant de "ta traduction"
allez un effort, tu as dit dans un autre sujet que tu n'es pas mauvais en anglais, donc je suis sure que tu pourras corriger certaines fautes toi meme
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Old 05-05-2006, 08:56 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by djibril15
Bonjour
Pouvez vous améliorer ma traduction de ceci svp?

A propos de Pervenche, sa mère disait avec une sorte de gaieté inconsciente : « Oh, tu
sais, elle mène sa vie. (…) Qu’est-ce tu veux que je fasse ? Je ne vais pas la forcer. » Elle a
répété la phrase absurde : « Elle a sa vie et moi la mienne. »
Clémence a obtenu l’adresse de Pervenche. Apparemment, elle n’avait plus le
téléphone. On bien elle ne voulait plus qu’on l’appelle.
Un long week-end de septembre, Clémence a pris le train pour Marseille. Quand elle a
sonné à la porte, c’est un loubard qui est venu lui ouvrir. Un grand Antillais en short, avec un
tatouage en relief sur l’épaule, ou peut-être une cicatrice. Quand elle a dit qu’elle était la sœur
de Pervenche, il l’a laissée passer. Pervenche était dans la pièce du fond, elle venait de se
réveiller. Elle avait les traits bouffis, un T-shirt froissé, les cheveux sales. Clémence a eu du
mal à la reconnaître, depuis près de deux ans qu’elle ne l’avait pas vue.
Elles ont parlé de choses et d’autres, mais elles n’avaient plus rien à se dire. Elles
n’étaient plus sur la même longueur d’onde.




About Pervenche, her mother said with a kind of unconscious cheerfulness: "Oh, you know, she lives(...) What do you want that I do? I will not force her "She repeated the absurdity sentence : "she has her life and me the mine."
Clemence obtained the address of Pervenche. Apparently, she did not have any more the telephone. Or she did not want any more to be called.
A long weekend of September, Clémence travelled by the train for Marseille. When she rung at the door, it is a hooligan who came to open to him. A large West-Indian out of shorts, with a tattooing in relief on the shoulder, or perhaps a scar. When she said that she was the sister of Pervenche, he let her pass. Pervenche was in the part of the bottom, she had just awaked. She referred bouffis, a ruffled Tee-shirt, the dirty hair. Clemence had evil to recognize her, since nearly two years that she had not seen it.
They spoke about things and others, but they did not have anything any more to be said. They were not any more over the same wavelength.
Pouvez vous me dire ce qui va pas et me le reformuler? Merci d'avance
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Old 05-05-2006, 10:01 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Voici quelques propositions

Pervenche's mother said with a kind of unconscious cheerfulness: "Oh, you know, she lives the way she lives(...) What do you want me to do? I will not force her "She repeated the absurd sentence : "she has her life and I got mine."
Clemence obtained the address of Pervenche. Apparently, she did not have the telephone anymore. Or she did not want to be called anymore.
A long weekend of September, Clémence took the train to Marseille. When she knocked at the door, a hooligan came to open. He was a large West-Indian out of shorts, with a tattoo in relief on the shoulder, or perhaps a scar. When she said that she was Pervenche's sister, he let her came in. Pervenche was in the back room, she just waked up. She referred bouffis, a ruffled Tee-shirt, dirty hair. Clemence had a hard time to recognize her, it has been nearly two years since she last saw her.
They spoke about things and others, but they did not have anything anymore to tell each other. They were not anymore on the same wavelength.
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Old 05-05-2006, 11:12 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Elle avait les traits bouffis ===> She referred bouffis
C bon ca?
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